Tuesday, 21 June 2011


Sometimes Miracles work....and sometimes they doesn't.

That's miracles for you....

I is a miracle cause I IS.

Sometimes kitties can't be miracles.

Miracle II diedimuss tonight.

Princess is meowing a lot. She is distressedimuss. She has lost her kitties.

It was not Princesses' fault.

Sometimes Miracles aren't meant to be.

I is Maximus Spittimus and I knows.

I is sad.

Tomorrow is another day.

Wednesday, 15 June 2011

No I Don't Believe In Miracles.....But I Almost Did....

As the Aide de Camp to Maximus Spittimus, I can only apoligise for the laxadasical posting....There has been much occupying me apart from The Emporer Maximus Spittimus....

I suspect he is not entirely happy with this temporary condition....I sense my toes may suffer the consequences of HIS indignation.

My wife and I (bloody hell...I sound like the Queen...'My husband and I'...) are in a British Charity called 'Cats Protection '.......We look after stray cats that are homeless and unwanted. We have a 'Cat Palace' at the bottom of the garden. It is heated and, frankly, if the wifey ever has the sense to throw me out I will move in there. I may decline to eat cat food but I will be warm and dry......;-)

Two 'new arrivals' were...and are...mother and son.

The female was pregnant. We had no idea she was pregnant. She certainly didn't look pregnant and she didn't eat like she was pregnant. We aren't psychic. She was pregnant and we didn't know.

Princess - as we have since called her - gave birth over night.

In the morning we found 2 still born kittens and an extremely distressed kitten no more than 5 or 6 hours old who she was clearly rejecting.

'Miracle' was promptly removed from the 'scene' and spent the night wrapped in a tea towel with disposable rubber gloves filled with warm water and stuffed down the wifey's bra.

Cinicat...a milk substitute...was fed to him via a small syringe.

Miracle survived the night via the wifey denying herself sleep and feeding him every hour on the hour.

The following day he was transferred to a lactating Queen with three 10 day old kittens at a Veterinary surgery in London.

After convincing two of her kittens to 'pee' on a bit of cotton wool and then wiping Miracle with said pee soaked cotton wool, the lactating female immediately washed him and drew him in to suckle.

Miracle suckled.

There was a chance. A slim chance but the 'adoptive' mother was 'up for it'.

When a rejected kitten is rejected in 99% of cases it will die. Even if it's had the joy of being in my wife's bra....

'Miracle' survived another night. The 'adoptive' mother was supurb!!! She drew Miracle in and he was hers.

His strength wasn't enough. He couldn't suckle enough.

Miracle died at 7:02 p.m. on 15th June 2011.

We tried so hard Miracle....Honest we did.....

After dropping off 'Miracle' in London the wifey went to sleep.....

That evening we went to the 'Cat Palace' to feed the strays......We opened Princesse's pen and.....

...another kitten.....she'd given birth over 8 hours after 'Miracle'!!!...and....she hadn't rejected this baby.

You didn't make it 'Miracle'.....I'm so so sorry baby...we tried so hard.....

The adoptive Queen was magnificent!...She took you as her own but it wasn't enough.....

For what it's worth...if your baby sister makes it she will be called 'Miracle' too.....

...She is you.

Sleep tight Miracle.

Our tears are warm for you....and our joy if your baby sister makes it will be tears of joy.....

Pleae let her make it......PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!

Four Dinners
Aide de Camp
Maximus Spittimus

Saturday, 11 June 2011


 This is me....lookiing forward to my currymuss!!!

The little Two Legs is home with her little man Two Legs.

My Two Legses are here.

They is having a currymuss tonight. I likes currymuss. I eats Chicken Vindaloo.

I then drinks a lot of water and, even better, I farts in the night.

As I sleeps near lady Two Legs face this is fun.

I is off to eats my currymuss.

I is MAXIMUS SPITTIMUS  and I has spokens......later I will have farted...;-)

Wednesday, 1 June 2011

I IS Therefore I IS

I is and will always be.

I is Maximus Spittimus and I will always be Maximus Spittimus.

There is a question?


Just to reminds you as The Two Legs is busy and hasn't the times to postimuss....

You is my Centurions so stay faithful or the wrath of Maximus may come downs on youimuss!!!

I is MAXIMUS SPITTIMUS and I has spokens...