Tuesday, 16 August 2011


Man Two Legs came downstairs this morning. Scampi had been a bit wobblymuss lately. I think we all knew he was nearing the end.

Still, 22 years is a good age for a cat! He had been sleeping on an armchair for two weeks and Scampi never slept in any chair.....he slept outside in all weathers and only came in when he was sickimuss - and even then the Two Legs had to wear thick gloves to take him to the Vets!!!!

The Two Legs put a blanky in the kitchen near the cat flap so he could run out when he wanted. Scampi slept on his blankymuss. He stopped running out of the cat flap.

He was lying on his blanky in the kitchen. When man Two Legs walked in to put the kettle on - what is kettle? - Scampi meowed.

Man Two Legs picked him up - that was when I knew. NOBODY. NOBODY ever picked up Scampi.

Man Two Legs carried him to water bowlimuss and tried to get him to drink. He meowed again and Man Two Legs put him back on his blanky.

His will was still there but his old body was letting him down.

Man Two Legs called Lady Two Legs and Little Two Legs and they stroked him and kissed him and he went. Just like that.

Seconds before he went he did something oddimuss.

When his sister, Tiddler, was here he used to put his right paw on her head.

He raised his right paw and held it in mid-air for a while......then he went.

My Scampi has gone.

I am bereft....I am inconsolableimuss....I am hungry....

Feed me!

I is MAXIMUS SPITTIMUS and I has lost my Scampi....now FEED ME!!!!
Bye old friend...sleep tight...Fourdinners, Caz and Jax  xxxxxx

Monday, 8 August 2011

I Is Here!!! So Two Legs CAN find The Timeimuss???

Two Legs?.....phtttt!!!

He is lazimuss....

I IS HERE. HE doesn't even knows I is....Little Two Legs has come home from Madagascar and she hugs me and kisses me. SHE knows I is HERE and she has been in Madagascar!!!!

We is waiting to be fed and man Two legs is getting all huffimuss...."We is due at the airport" he says....AND???

He wants to go to airport (what is airport????) before he feeds us????


I will be takings controlimuss of this house again. I has been too softimuss. I has let Two Legs get untrained.

I has made mistake. I has been too kindimuss. Maximus will regain total controlimuss.

Two Legs is warnedimuss!!!!

The Bumbles has told me.....The Two Legs is good and will feedimuss all of us but WE must remind them WE is in charge.

They will be reminded.

I is MAXIMUS SPITTIMU8S and I has spokens.