Friday, 3 December 2010

The Maximus Spittimus, aka Wriggly Kitty's, Army

I is MAXIMUS SPITTIMUS. I is Emperor and Lord of ALL I SURVEY - and any bits that I don't survey....just cause I am not surveying them doesn't mean they aren't MINE!

I has 'nickname' according to Two Legs. I is 'Wriggly Kitty'.

Wriggly Kitty????

What is Wriggly Kitty????

"We picks you up and you 'wriggles'" says Two Legs....True...I does....but...BUT!

I is Emperor Maximus Spittimus!!!! I can only be picked upimuss when I wants to be picked upimuss!!!

Wriggly Kitty?......Oh dearimuss.....Two Legs have no idea have they????

Two Legs ARE useful...they feed us and my bidding...and things...

Take Blackie for instance...He was Blackie and now he's Stealth Bomber...which is, I admit, far more appropriateimuss....

He doesn't answer to 'Blackie' anymore...he only answers to 'Stealthy' I supposeimuss his nickname is now his nameimuss.....

Bumble is always Bumble....sometimes she is 'The Bumbles'....either way she just IS.

We is BRIGHT EYES!!!! Bumble (The Bumbles) by my sideimuss and Stealth (Stealthy) Bomber formerly known as Blackie guarding the space that belongs to MAXIMUS SPITTIMUS!!!

The 'wise one' that is Scampi is Scampi - but Two Legs call him 'The Creaking Gate'....Scampi is not a gate!...creaking or otherwiseimuss!!!! Gates are not CATS!!! Two Legs are weird......

Scampi stays on the ground and does not climb anymore....he knows the ground is the sensible place to be...

It is so good that I is THE EMPEROR!!! If I wasn't in chargeimuss nobody would know who anybody elseimuss WAS!!!!!



  1. Thanks for setting us straight! It's excellent to know what is what. And that you're on top of it all!

  2. You is very wise oh Spittimus!

    Nubbin wiggles,

  3. All hail glorious Emperor Maximus Spittimus!! Me and Charlie your loyal and most senior centurions are in AWE at your managerial skills!!! Two legs is one very lucky centurion to have you to guide him!!! Your empire is a beacon to all others!!! We bow in complete AWE at your AWESOMENESS!!

    We are dazzled by Stealth Bomber's and The Bumbles' laser eyes!! What magic!!! And wise and venerated Scampi is just very wise and very venerated!! Yay!

    Take care

  4. Whew! IT's a good thing you're in charge and able to keep everybuddy straight. It kinda sounds like the two leggers are, well, a bit confused, if you asks me.

    Wiggles & Wags,

  5. Oh Maximus,

    God to know you understand how things should be.

  6. I would kill the two legs whilst they sleep I would

  7. Oh my gosh it was right out of Laser Cats there! Truly you have a formidable army Maximus!

  8. Loving all those lasers!...We finally got our Mommy off her a** and sent in a photo so we can join your Centurions!!...Happy weekend, sweet friends...kisses...Calle, Halle, Sukki
    Hail to handsome Emperior Maximus :)

  9. Hi Maximus! We hate that our mom keeps getting behind so we get behind in visiting! We think you are a great Emperormus and we also think it is cool that you have all your helpers there! We need to get our mom to send a picture of us - she is so bad - we want to be Centurions too!